The funny side of hysterectomies…yes there are some!

Ok, now that I got the sad thing out of the way, there have actually been some pretty funny things that have come out of this whole hysterectomy thing.

1) In our family it is a big joke that the reason that I can find everything that is lost in this house is that I use my uterus to locate it. When I told the older kids that I was having a hysterectomy, the first thing that Jake said was, “Oh No! How will we find anything around here without your uterus!?!?!”  Coley looked nervous and said, ” My uterus isn’t trained yet? I’m not ready!”  HA! My kids crack me up. Just what I needed.

2) DJ, my super smart kid, who has performed numerous dissections in his Biology classes, asked me if my uterus would grow back. And when I laughed and said no, he asked if I would still be able to have babies. I looked at him and said, ” DJ, haven’t you studied this in Biology?” He said that he had, but that I wasn’t a cat so he wasn’t sure.

3) The night before my surgery, I told Hannah to tell her soccer coach that she probably wouldn’t be at practice on Wednesday. I explained that I would be coming home from the hospital that day and I wasn’t sure if she would be able to go to practice. After she was done with soccer, I asked her if she had told her coach what I told her to. She said that she had and then she said, “Mom, I told Krista that you have had several of your organs removed and that you were have surgery to remove another one! She was amazed and fascinated that you would be able to live with so many of your organs taken out.”  ( side note, I have had my appendix and gallbladder removed…apparently that equals several organs to a 9 year old. )

4) In a completely hormonal and melodramatic moment, I referred to myself as a “hollowed out jack o’ lantern that had my guts just scooped out and thrown away!” I also believe that I claimed to be a “gutted out fish” and a “barren empty cavern.” So maybe I am a touch melodramatic?!?

5) My mom ( God bless her!) came to my house to “babysit” me the second week after my surgery. I have had to be very careful not pick up anything over 10 pounds, no simple task with a 26 pound baby! She came to take care of me and the boys and to do any lifting that needed to be done. After the second or third day of her coming, Aiden looked at her and asked, ” Why do you need to come and babysit Nicole?!”

Another amazing thing that has happened, isn’t really funny as much as it is a really wonderful thing. I have been so blessed that my dear friend Lori arranged for us to have dinner made for us for over two weeks! That was such a blessing! And on top of that, my amazing little sister, brought us about a weeks worth of meals too! I just now, a month later, started to make dinner again! The food was fantastic, but even better was the fact hat so many people took time out of their crazy busy lives to do something so generous for me and my family.  Wow! Blessed Beyond!

The new me…

I have been thinking about this post and writing it in my head off and on for about a month now, but I just wasn’t ready to put it down here. I had a hysterectomy. There it is. My life has been redefined again. Some of you might not understand what the big deal is, and that is fine, but to me…it is a big deal. For the last 12 years, Brian and I have centered our lives and our marriage around being open to God’s will for our family, particularly our family size. We have followed the Catholic Church’s teachings on family planning and have been abundantly blessed 9 times over.  
Look at this picture! NINE beautiful times over. What more can I say. 
After we had Jonathan, I felt a peace and a contentment with the size of our family that I really had never had before. I felt as if God was gently saying that our family was complete and I was ok with that. At least I thought that I was ok with that until the choice was made for me…permanently. I had a doctor’s appointment for my annual exam and I told the doctor that I had been having a lot of pain and cramping around my cycle. After examining me she said that I had fibroid tumors in my uterus. I had an ultrasound to confirm it. They were already fairly large and would only continue to grow and cause more and more problems. She recommended a hysterectomy. I knew that it was coming, because after I found out about the fibroids, I did exactly what I shouldn’t have done and I went on to the internet. I researched and read everything that I could find. Some people might think that was a bad idea, but I like to be informed and prepared. So I knew what was coming. I was ready. And when my doctor said that it was really the only permanent solution to all of the problems that I had been having, I knew that she was right and I agreed. I agreed and I was ready, that is until I got into my car and called Brian to tell him what she had said. And then I cried. I cried and I cried and I cried. It is so final. The choice had been made that our family really was complete. This was a choice that when I thought that I had made it, I felt good about it. But now that it was definite, I was sad. I was grieving. I am still mourning the loss of this part of me. The part of me that has carried tiny humans and their perfect little souls under my heart. The part of me that has made me so much of who and what I am today, a mother, a wife, a woman. The sadness still comes and goes. I have found that the best comfort is to grab one of my 9 blessings and snuggle them or read to them or talk to them. I am so blessed to have kids spanning so many ages. I have a snugly baby, a toddler who loves to be read to. I have elementary kids that draw me beautiful masterpieces and play “Cold fish” (otherwise known as Go fish!) with me. I have teenagers who will sit and tell about their day.  I have a husband who loves me no matter what shape I am in, physically or mentally ( Thank God for that!).  My family is complete, completely perfect just for me.